Have you ever had an orgasm that made you cry?
Have you ever been so lost within your own body that you feel like you are in a whole other world?
Like you fell completely into your body and everything else melted away? And then when you came back to reality you were overcome with a wave of relief and movement of emotion.
Sex can be meditative, transformative and healing - if you let it be.
I believe that your sexual being does not exist locked away in a closet that is only to be opened when it’s time to take your clothes off, or for the sake of someone else. Your sexual being exists behind a door, in a room that holds multiple other doors. Through accessing your sexual being you gain access to your creativity, your adventure, your zen, your OM, whatever it is that connects us all.
The Connection to our Erotic Self
I use my sexual energy in a multitude of ways. I tap in when I’m dancing, when I’m painting, when I’m ranting about politics, when I’m making dinner (or letting my partner make me dinner), when I’m cleansing my face and moisturizing my skin, when I’m heartbroken and sobbing, when I’m laughing so hard I can’t breathe, when I’m singing at the top of my lungs in the car. Anytime I am passionately creative, taking care of my body, or allowing myself to fully feel my emotions - I am channeling my sexual spirit. Every bit of me is connected.
Every fulfilling sexual experience I’ve ever had, has happened while my sexual energy is fully present.
Maybe it’s just me. But I’m willing to bet others feel this way too. I’m willing to bet we’ve all had an experience that we’re comparing to all the others. An experience with our sexual selves that left us feeling like that was the answer. That was the reason, the a-ha moment. Like a huge shift had occurred and we would never be the same. Like everything that had ever harmed us came rushing to the surface and poured out of our bodies like water. Like, if only for a moment, we were completely healed.
Maybe it wasn’t necessarily a sexual experience, but a vulnerable one. Sex, intimacy, and vulnerability are all connected. They are all born from the same being within us. We access them from the same room. Whether it was a sexual experience with a partner, an amazing solo-session, a deep conversation, or a private silent moment within yourself doesn’t matter. What matters is the effect these moments have on us. As well as recognizing the connection between these experiences and our sexuality.
If you fully awaken your sexual energy, the sex you’re having (alone or with an open partner) can become a healing and transformative act.
Sex, Yoga, Meditation
I love having sex for the same exact reasons as why I love practicing yoga. Both practices pull me out of operating from my mind into operating from my heart. They disconnect me from my monkey mind - and help me channel my inner wisdom.They drop me into a place of being in the present moment and existing fully in my body. Fluidly moving and flowing in ways that excite and ignite my senses. Whether I’m having sex or doing sun salutations, my heart rate is up, my body feels amazing and my mind is quiet.
I treat yoga and sex both as daily meditative practices.
There’s a long list of benefits to meditation, yoga, and sex. If you google it, you’ll find a lot of overlap between these lists. Activating the relaxation response in your brain, releasing oxytocin, exercising your body, etc. I think this is because they are all essentially the same thing. They are all more alike at their core than different. They all exist as a pathway to deepen our connections with ourselves.
Where to start?
So, it starts with being vulnerable. It starts with opening that door and coming face to face with that part of yourself. Depending on the relationship you have with yourself, this may either sound like the easiest or hardest and scariest thing to imagine. Both are okay. From there, I believe we are called to meet ourselves with unconditional love and acceptance. I believe it is vital to our well-being that we continuously go back to this place and utilize this energy that we hold.
I call you to open that door.
To embrace your erotic.
To meet your naked soul with loving arms and dance.
P.S - This will look different for every individual. If you’re not sure where to start - I can offer personal practices, rituals, exercises and resources. If you feel called for guidance from me, send me an email or DM.