It’s not always easy to explain that my career goals include researching and educating people about sex, especially to the more conservative people of my circles. This is because sex is still considered taboo, uncomfortable or downright sinful to some people in our society. This amazing, fun, spiritual and beautiful experience that almost everyone does and enjoys doing - is still so hard to talk to about…
When I decided I wanted to start a blog it was because I have a lot to say. I speak a lot about sex, relationships, pleasure and the spiritual transformations that happen when you become vulnerable. I have a long list of topics to talk about and it became difficult to decide which one to begin with. Orgasms? The clitoris? “The Talk”? While I do plan on addressing these different areas of conversation, it became apparent that first I needed to address within myself the real reasons I love talking about these things. Maybe the reason it was still so hard to explain to certain people why I was pursuing this path was because I hadn’t yet been vulnerable with myself about the real reasons I was doing this. What was the motivation behind my desire to study, talk and write about something still so controversial to some people - some of them close to me? So here it is. This is why I love talking about sex.
1. I believe that relationships serve as mirrors. We learn about ourselves through how we relate to people we love. Things you don’t like about others are reflections of things you don’t like about yourself and same for things you love about others. Interacting within a relationship shows you parts of yourself that you can’t see through any other means. Sex takes this to a deeper level. Through allowing yourself to be completely vulnerable to someone else, you strip away every wall you’ve put up around yourself. To trust enough and be open enough to be naked and reveal the most “private parts” of yourself to someone else can be seen as a metaphor for bearing your soul. Magical transformations within yourself can occur when you let go of everything and become absolutely and totally vulnerable. Sex is intimate. Intimacy with yourself or others opens doors to the deep and hidden areas of your being.
2. It. Is. Necessary. Sex is one of the most natural parts of life. It affects our health, our quality of life, our self image, our happiness - and yet when it comes to learning about this part of ourselves we are so often left to our own devices or left with absolutely nothing. The less we talk about our sexual lives, experiences and knowledge the more shameful and uncomfortable the conversation becomes. The more negative emotions surround sex - the more negative sex becomes. On a broader scale - less education leads to greater risk. People who receive little to no sex education are at a higher risk for STD’s and unintended pregnancies. I want to talk about sex because I want to shatter the unnecessary barriers that have been established in our society. We all deserve frank and honest education. We all deserve to be open. We all deserve to cease hiding such an important part of life.
3. I want to be vulnerable. I want to trust life enough to follow what I’m passionate about - no matter how uncomfortable it makes some people.
My sexual journey has been wonderful, beautiful, and at some points catastrophic. Very much like my whole life. Our sexual lives are only reflections of the rest of life. It is the very act that creates life. How more important could that possibly be?